sophiaalessandro's Blog

I suspected that this could be true before but now I am convinced. Just when i convince myself that I am smart, and thoughtful, and independent, I find myself having feelings for a man I do not even know. Are all girls as stupid and silly as me? It is like I allow my emotions to lead me lIke a burrow, only ass first. Will age and experience ever be able to mute the manly voices in my head to do whatever it takes to win the love of a man? I hope so, this really sucks.

I cried this morning. It surprised me that such an innocent conversation had stimulated such deep emotion. What is surprising to me is that I seldom cry. I am very emotional but I usually suppress the tears and just get depressed. And, it wasn't a sad thought that brought it out, it was a loving thought. Yes, part was sad but the feelings that made me cry were the loving thoughts surrounding my dear papa over the loss of my mamma. I was not crying for my mamma, I was crying because I realized how much my papa loved me and how unselfish he has been with me over the years after we lost her. 
Funny, such a huge event that can effect your mood without you even noticing the issue which is causing it. Too complicated I know. But I think I need to be in touch with my happiness and not my sadness. The happiness is what seems to evoke the deepest thoughts and the warmest feelings. I needed to cry, I needed it bad. Thank you my wonderful stranger friend for being there for me this morning. .